21.2.12

cue exposure.



















Above: huh, I did in fact take a photo of the surprisingly good Szechuan peppercorn/chili oil tofu pancakes last Friday assembled by the lovely and talented KK (don't worry, this is not a photo of eating them: this is preparing them, they have yet to be fried at this point). The fridge still smells like kimchi by the way, which I guess could be a good thing, but yeah it's not.

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So, OK, that took a little longer than I wanted, but shit is done. There's really something perverse about the amount of pleasure I get from not doing "my job", but some of that fucking-off time was spent procuring tyrosine-rich foodstuffs for lunch: steak, avocado, green salsa. Chocolate with almond butter for dessert.

INTERESTING UPDATE: 7 hours later, I feel about 1000% better mentally than I did this morning. Tyrosine, or psychic coincidence?

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Things are getting a little scientific around here, and I apologize, but I'm just trying to make some better sense of everything. I'm going to retreat back to not-so-much-blogging tomorrow, because I've gots other fishes to fry yo and because blogging is part of my obsessive problem, yes, thank you, I know.

But in terms of self-education for non-studying times, there's this, and then I haven't really looked at it extensively, but this Seth Roberts-esque self-research blog has what seems to be a very relevant article on retraining your limbic brain.

And apparently there's a non-chemical-based cure for insomnia. Most believeable sentence: "One of the immediate benefits that patients note is the reduction of “anticipatory anxiety” — the time and concern spent worrying about what the night will bring. Many insomniacs see their bedroom as a prison or place of dread."

Totally true, my bed at night is a tOOOtal fucking place of dread, unless there's a squawking mooperbird in it. But then she has to be awake, otherwise it's back to the squawkless fucking dread.

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OK, back to studying.

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