23.6.17

burger test #1.























This one gets a 7/10. Not bad in any way, but not juicy or spicy or generally decadent enough, needs something like the vermouth/jalapeno/pickle mayo hinted at here to sex it up.

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18.6.17

for posterity.

Because, you know, the future needs vegan lemon ricotta too. Goddamn when is someone going to come up with the lexical equivalent of "cheese" to describe all of these creamy processed nut concoctions that hundreds of thousands of people are making at home to substitute for cheese.

I made this ricotta substitute to put into a noodle-less zucchini Parmesan, which also doesn't have any Parmesan, so goddamnit we're going to need another name for this as well. Cashew in Italian is "anacardio"....and I basically made this.

By the way, some airbnb guests left three pieces of real cheese last week, it was really good.

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zucchini al forno con anacardio e pomodoro. 
3 zucchini/courgettes, sliced lengthwise into 1/4-inch planks
1 cup of lemon cashew ricotta (below)

2 cans tomatoes
2 bay leaves
2 garlic cloves
2 splashes red wine
2 glugs olive oil
pinch smoked paprika
2 tsp sugar
1 carrot
1 celery stalk
1 cup cooked green/brown lentils

1 good handful of fresh basil leaves, torn

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lemon cashew ricotta. 

1 cup unroasted cashews.
2 cups water

3/4 tsp salt
1/2 tsp miso
zest of one lemon
juice of one half lemon

So, put the cashews and water in a pan and boil for 10 minutes. Drain the cashews, reserving the water you've drained off. Then combine 1/2 cup of that water and the cashews themselves in a food processor and process til it looks like ricotta. Then add your salt, lemon zest, lemon juice, and miso, and process some more. If it's too thick, add a little more of the cashew water. If it's not, well don't do anything. Just chill.

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jus.

This is always improvised, and I always worry it's going to fuck up, and it never does, but just in case:

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gluten-free vegetarian gravy.

1 tbsp tapioca flour
1/2 cup cold water
1/2 vegetable bouillon cube
1 tbsp Worcestershire sauce
pinch thyme
freshly ground black pepper
1 tbsp butter

Mix the tapioca and the water in a small bowl, before heating anything. When tapioca is dissolved, put the mixture in a small saucepan and add everything but the butter. After it comes to a boil, let it simmer for a minute or two until it's the desired thickness, then add butter. Salt and pepper to taste.

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15.6.17

black bean bitterballen.























Nelson/Hoogte Labs produced this bit of wonder over the past couple of days. It's a real, delicious, vegan vegetarian bitterbal made with black beans and pureed/whipped pozole, rolled in panko, deep-fried, and served with an outstanding vegan piccalilli mayo. Really impressive if I do say so myself, which I can because I only did half of it.























Why isn't it vegan? The chick running the deep-fryer couldn't get the panko to stick without an egg, so we need to look into a replacement technology here. And anyway, unbeknownst to the deep-fryer chick, the asshole running the blender had already added butter to the whipped posole so veganness was out the window.

Additionally, the whole concept was fucked with so much on its way to greatness that reproducing it will be a challenge. Leftover Rancho Gordo posole won't always be in the freezer for example. But I'm thinking if you roast a bag of corn (do they even have bags of corn here?) in the oven for 15 or 45 minutes and then whip it in a blender with oat milk and coconut oil that you might get close. Should also figure out if heating the oat milk is actually thickening the whole thing or if that's a myth.

The Labs also pumped out this alien looking thing today.























The internets told me it was the best thing to do with leftover pasta, and indeed it was pretttttttty good. It's Mark Bittman's recipe plus a handful of chopped spinach, one scallion and one clove of crushed garlic.

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